Kia

Kia's death sent me into a spiral. I had just finished my morning meeting at work and checked my cell phone as I walked back into my office.

The message said "Wtf happened to Kia". And I knew. Silent Scream. I had to leave work. I made it to my car to call my mother through my tears. She had already seen it on Facebook and didn't want to tell me earlier. I went home and got in the bed. I stayed there for two days.

For context, I met Kia because she went to middle school with Kevin. She was best friends with his first wife, and then became friends with me too. That's just the type of person she was. Kevin and I hung out with Kia and her husband JR as often as we could. We always had a ball! But more importantly, Kia and I would text often and check in with each other. When I got engaged and was overwhelmed with wedding planning, she said she would make sure my day was special, even without the wedding party I originally wanted. She gave me words of encouragement the night before the wedding. She told me that I was getting the best version of Kevin that she had ever seen. She sang in the wedding. And she was right, she helped to make the day special.

When I called to tell her that KP had a stroke, she was devastated but jumped into action. She was at the hospital almost every day (despite her own health issues). She prayed over him, read him bible verses, sang to him, cried over him and even brought the pastor of her church to the hospital to "pray him out" of the coma.

She was there the day we took him off life support. She was there with me and his body at the hospital the day he died (until the nurse put us out). After he passed she checked on me EVERY DAY. She wanted to make sure I was eating, she offered for her and JR to go and buy Kevin's suit for the funeral. She was another friend that was JUST THERE.

Kia asked me to hang out in early June. We went to an all white party. I remember thinking I wouldn't go because I didn't want to chance being emotional in front of her and JR, but I changed my mind. They were a connection to my husband and I love being around those who were close to him to feel his energy. We had such a good time. Kia and I danced the night away. Who knew that would be the last time I would see her alive.

I noticed that I hadn't heard from Kia in about a week, so I sent her a text and she didn't answer. I told my mother that it was odd that I didn't hear back from her and I was concerned. I was really just thinking that she wasn't feeling well. I knew she was sick. And I knew sometimes she was pushing aside her own pain to comfort me. I would ask her "Kia, how are YOU feeling? We are always talking about me!" And she would respond, "Don't worry about me. I have my good days and bad days, but I'll be fine". She wasn't fine. The last text I got from her was on Thursday, July 31st. She said "Girl...long story to type. I'll have to call you. Way too much to type". I invited her over to talk in person, but got no response.

Kevin passed on 5/1, Kia passed on 8/4. Kevin's funeral was on 5/23, Kia's was on 8/24. I hope they are in heaven watching over JR and I - and proud of how we honored them. Kia's service was this past Sunday and it was beautiful. She was beautiful.

Silent Scream.